Dr. Alastair McAlpine is a palliative care physician in Cape Town, South Africa who spends his days easing the pain of children who are dying. He is called in not to cure his patients, but to make them comfortable and make their deaths as painless as possible.
McAlpine recently took to Twitter to reveal what his patients told him when he asked them what really matters in life.
For an assignment, I asked some of my terminal paediatric palliative care patients what they had enjoyed in life, and what gave it meaning. Kids can be so wise, y’know. Here are some of the responses (Thread).
— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
The results of this informal survey are sure to bring tears to your eyes.
McAlpine began by saying that none of the kids said that they wish that they’d spent more time watching television or on the internet.
First:
NONE said they wished they’d watched more TV
NONE said they should’ve spent more time on Face Book
NONE said they enjoyed fighting with others
NONE enjoyed hospital
/1— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
The doctor said that many of the children talked about missing their pets.
MANY mentioned their pets:
‘I love Rufus, his funny bark makes me laugh.’
‘I love when Ginny snuggles up to me at night and purrs’
‘I was happiest riding Jake on the beach.’
/2— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
He also said that many of the children talked about their parents.
MANY mentioned their parents, often expressing worry or concern:
‘Hope mum will be ok. She seems sad.’
‘Dad mustn’t worry. He’ll see me again soon.’
‘God will take care of my mum and dad when I’m gone’
/3— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
Of course, a lot of the kids mentioned ice cream!
ALL of them loved ice-cream.
/4— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
Reading made a huge difference in many of their lives.
ALL of them loved books or being told stories, especially by their parents:
‘Harry Potter made me feel brave.’
‘I love stories in space!’
‘I want to be a great detective like Sherlock Holmes when I’m better!’Folks, read to your kids! They love it. /5
— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
The terminally ill kids also told McAlpine that they believe people should not waste their time worrying.
MANY wished they had spent less time worrying about what others thought of them, and valued people who just treated them ‘normally’.
‘My real friends didn’t care when my hair fell out.’
‘Jane came to visit after the surgery and didn’t even notice the scar!’ /6— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
The doctor said that the children talked about how much they love the beach.
Many of them loved swimming, and the beach.
‘I made big sandcastles!’
‘Being in the sea with the waves was so exciting! My eyes didn’t even hurt!’ /7— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
The kids also talked about the importance of kindness.
Almost ALL of them valued kindness above most other virtues:
‘My granny is so kind to me. She always makes me smile.’
‘Jonny gave me half his sandwich when I didn’t eat mine. That was nice.’
‘I like it when that kind nurse is here. She’s gentle. And it hurts less’ /8— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
Laughter was very important to the children.
Almost ALL of them loved people who made them laugh:
‘That magician is so silly! His pants fell down and I couldn’t stop laughing!’
‘My daddy pulls funny faces which I just love!’
‘The boy in the next bed farted! Hahaha!’Laughter relieves pain. /9
— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
Being kids, they loved their toys!
Kids love their toys, and their superheroes.
‘My Princess Sophia doll is my favourite!’
‘I love Batman!’ (All the boys love Batman)
‘I like cuddling my teddy’ /10— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
Finally, the kids all valued the time they spent with their family.
Finally, they ALL valued time with their family. Nothing was more important.
‘Mum and dad are the best!’
‘My sister always hugs me tight’
‘No one loves me like mummy loves me!’ /11— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
McAlpine concluded his thread with a full recap of what they said.
Take home message:
Be kind. Read more books. Spend time with your family. Crack jokes. Go to the beach. Hug your dog. Tell that special person you love them.These are the things these kids wished they could’ve done more. The rest is details.
Oh… and eat ice-cream. /End
— Alastair McAlpine (@AlastairMcA30) February 1, 2018
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