Kelly Clarkson became a household name after winning the first season of “American Idol” back in 2002, but that doesn’t mean she thought that she would be able to sustain a longterm career. Clarkson, 38, opened up about these career doubts while interviewing Andy Cohen on her eponymous talk show on Friday.

When Cohen asked if Clarkson ever thought she would be so successful in her career all these years later, she said that she thought she’d be “the most famous cocktail waitress in Texas.” She then talked about the experience of competing on “American Idol,” describing the life-changing experience as “so pure and raw.”

“Nobody knew, not even the people doing the show knew if it would work or not in America,” she explained.

These days, Clarkson is one of the most successful “American Idol” winners, as she has become both a Grammy-winning artist and a beloved talk show host.

While her career has been successful, Clarkson’s personal life has been a bit more of a struggle. For the past year, she’s been in the midst of a divorce from her husband Brandon Blackstock, and she recently admitted that the split has been “horrible” for her.

“I’m going through one right now. It’s horrible,” she said of her divorce. “There are so many hard parts. The hardest for me is the kids. That’s the hardest for me. I think, as women especially, we’re trained… to take it all on, and you can deal with it, and you’re fine, but it’s your babies that you worry about.”

Clarkson and Blackstock share two young children together. Court documents came out at the end of last year confirming that Clarkson’s divorce had taken a nasty turn.

“The level of conflict between the parents has increased,” the documents stated. “The parties have a difficult time co-parenting due to issues of trust between them.”

“Brandon’s been equally unreasonable in his requests for child and spousal support, as well as attorney fees,” a source told People Magazine. “Kelly’s offered to pay for all the kids’ expenses, but Brandon seems to think he is entitled to and needs $301K in spousal support and $135K in child support per month.”

If Blackstock gets his way, he’ll be getting $5.2 million per year from Clarkson.

“Additionally, he’s already asked for $2M for attorney fees when he’s the one driving up the cost of the divorce with seven attorneys just representing him alone,” the source continued.