A Sunday school lesson was being taught to first graders about the plan of salvation.  As she taught them, the teacher asked “If I sold my house and my car, had
a big garage sale, and gave all my money to the church, would I
get into heaven?”

“No!” all the children responded in unison.

“If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the yard, and kept
everything neat and tidy, would I get into heaven?” the teacher asked.

Once again, the kids responded, “No!”

“Well,” she said, “then how can I get to heaven?”

One boy replied with confidence, “You’ve gotta be dead!”

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A little girl was sitting watching her mother do dishes in the sink in the kitchen. All of a sudden, she saw her mother had numerous strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.

The little girl looked up at her mother and inquisitively asked, “Why are some
of your hairs white, Mom?”

“Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of
my hairs turns white,” her mother replied.

After thinking about this revelation for a second, the little girl said, “Momma, how come ALL of grandma’s hairs are white?”

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A three-year-old went with his dad to look at a litter of kittens. When they got home, he breathlessly told his mother that there were two boy kittens and two girl kittens.

“How did you know?” his mom asked.

“Daddy picked them up and looked underneath,” he replied. “I think it’s printed on the bottom.”