This Obituary is Dead-on

In today’s world, we see news stories about people who are getting offended over every little thing. It seems that we’ve lost the ability to reason with things rationally and get offended all too easily.

With that said, it only makes sense that we mourn the passing of a very old, but loved, friend – Common Sense. He’s been with us for years, and we’re not sure exactly how old he is, but he will be remembered for the lessons he has taught us.

He’s taught us things like when to come in out of the rain, that life isn’t always fair, and that yes, sometimes we are at fault. He lived simply and had simple financial policies, like don’t spend more than you can earn, and adults, not children, should always be in charge.

Common Sense began to decline rapidly when overbearing regulations were put into place. He was devastated when a six-year-old boy was charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate, was shocked when a teen was suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch, and couldn’t believe it when a teacher got fired for reprimanding an unruly student.

His health continued to decline when parents accused teachers of failing to do a job that they should have done themselves, when schools started to require parental permission to give children headache medicine, but couldn’t tell parents if their daughter was pregnant and wanted an abortion.

As the churches became business and criminals received better treatment than their victims, Common Sense lost the will to live. He took an additional beating when we lost the right to defend our home from a burglar and burglars could sue you for assaulting them when they entered your home.

Common Sense finally gave up when a woman sued for spilling coffee in her lap that she claimed she wasn’t aware was hot. She was awarded a huge settlement and Common Sense couldn’t believe it.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents Truth and Trust, his wife Discretion, his daughter Responsibility, and his son Reason. He is survived by five step brothers I Know My Rights, I Want It Now, Someone Else Is To Blame, I Am A Victim, and Pay Me For Doing Nothing.

Common Sense’s funeral was not attended by many because not many people knew he was gone. If you remember Common Sense, please pass this on.


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